What Do You Mean I Can't Park Here?
by Erin87
Summary: Sheppard and the team run into a little trouble with the natives while visiting a new planet.


A.N.1: Hi! This is another prompt-based ficlet. The title is the prompt. Enjoy! :)

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What Do You Mean I Can't Park Here? 

"Oh, this is just great," groaned an exasperated Rodney, voice dripping with his usual brand of sarcasm. "We were here for what? Two seconds?"

"I believe it has been considerably longer than that, Rodney," said Teyla absently, a tense edge to her voice that had nothing to do with the scientist's complaining. She was sitting in the co-pilot's seat of the jumper, leaning forward in the chair, eyes fixed on the scene unfolding beyond the windshield's glass.

"Yeah, Teyla's right," said John. "It's been more like eight."

Rodney just shot him a withering stare.

"They're not going to be able to get inside, are they?" asked Elizabeth from one of the cockpit's secondary seats, sounding mildly concerned.

John briefly turned his head to glance at her. "No, we're sealed up tight as a drum in here."

Everyone in the jumper except Ronon suddenly jumped as a loud thud reverberated through the small space; slimy chunks of the bright orange watermelon-sized fruit that had just collided with the windshield oozed down the glass. "Aw, come on!" moaned John, muttering, "That's not going to be fun to get off." Especially since he trusted very few people with the maintenance of his favorite jumper.

"Why don't we just leave?" grumbled Ronon, leaning against the frame of the bulkhead doors, arms crossed and an impatient look on his face.

Outside, the natives of the planet the team had just landed on were shouting angrily in an unknown language and waving weapons in the air. They couldn't do any real damage to the Ancient ship, but that didn't make John feel any more at ease. "Well, it definitely doesn't look like these people are in a mood to give us what we came for. I'm all for pulling the plug on this one."

He swiveled in his chair and reached for the console's dials to begin prepping the ship for take-off. The holographic HUD immediately blinked into existence before the windshield, offering ever moving streams of readings on altitude, wind speed, and the local geography. At his touch, lights flared instantly into full glow and the gentle background hum of the jumper's engines notched up to another level.

"Wait," said Elizabeth. John stopped what he was doing and shifted his attention to her. Her eyes flitted from him to the woman sitting next to him. "Teyla, you said your people have had some dealings with the Adarans in the past. Can you understand any of what they're saying? Maybe if we can find out what we've done to upset them..."

Teyla moved to face Elizabeth and gave an uncertain half a nod. "I am afraid that Adari was a language which I never fully learnt; our dealings with them were few and far between. I can make out very little of what they are shouting..."

Elizabeth nodded, obviously a little disappointed, and was about to open her mouth to say something else when Teyla continued.

"... however, they seem to have taken issue with where we have landed the jumper."

"Oh God, we didn't squash anybody did we?" asked Rodney, wincing. "Cause that..."

"I didn't land on anybody, Rodney," said John, irritated at the slight to his piloting skills. He glanced at Teyla, unable to help the uncertainty that crept into his voice. "Did I?"

She shook her head, looking faintly amused. "No, Colonel, you did not." She looked up at Elizabeth, who had left her seat to stand nearer to the front of the jumper, arms folded across her chest. "From what they are saying -"

"You mean screaming," interrupted Rodney. Elizabeth tossed him a glare and Teyla just rolled her eyes before again taking up her interpretation.

"- I believe that the Adarans hold this site to be holy in some way. They think we have..." she paused, searching for the right word, "... _defaced_ the area with our presence."

Elizabeth nodded and looked out of the window. John could see the wheels turning in her head behind those serious green eyes. He got the sneaking feeling that he wasn't going to like whatever plan she was coming up with.

A moment later she turned to Teyla. "Do you think you could manage to act as a translator? I think I can get them to back down if..."

"No way you're gong out there," said John immediately. He gestured out the windshield. "Do you see that mob?"

"Yeah," put in Rodney, "all they're missing are flaming torches and pitchfor... oh wait," he sighed, "never mind, I saw one."

"Someone has to talk to them, John." Elizabeth fixed her eyes on him. "It needs to be made clear that this is just a misunderstanding. Patch through a comm to the outside."

He met her eyes. After a moment of silent communication he reluctantly did as she asked. With a combination of Teyla's translating and Elizabeth's diplomatic prowess, matters were soon settled for them to be allowed to leave the jumper to perform proper negotiations. John keyed off the comm; Elizabeth turned to Teyla and nodded.

"Alright, let's go." Teyla stood up and the two of them began heading towards the back of the jumper.

Rodney watched them walk by. "Wait," he said worriedly, "you two aren't seriously going out there by yourselves? That's crazy!"

"What? Absolutely not!" said John, leaping to his feet.

"Things are shaky enough as it is," said Elizabeth calmly. "It'll go better if they don't feel threatened."

"Then one more person isn't..."

"I was only able to negotiate for Teyla and myself; we're the only ones the Adarans are expecting. Any more might be taken as a sign of aggression, which certainly won't help matters any. Besides..." She smiled at him. "Someone has to move the jumper."

"Rodney can do it." John stepped into the back of the jumper and began fastening his P-90 to his tac vest.

"John..." Elizabeth caught and held his gaze. "We'll be alright," she said quietly.

John sighed mentally. As much as he didn't want to... he believed her. He looked over her shoulder and gave Teyla a questioning glance. She nodded in return; whatever happened, she'd be ready.

He met Elizabeth's eyes again and sighed, out loud this time. By way of an answer, he walked around the two women and hit the release for the hatch. As the ramp lowered itself to the ground, John crossed his arms and looked at each of them. "Alright, get outta here. Keep your radios on; I'll set the jumper down in the next clearing I find."

"We're going to hope that that one won't be sacred too," said Elizabeth lightly, shooting him a wry glance.

John gave a small smile. "Yeah, let's hope."

-o-

Some two and a half hours later, Ronon opened the rear hatch of the jumper to admit a weary but triumphant Elizabeth and Teyla. Elizabeth walked into the forward section and sank into her seat with a sigh. John felt a little bit concerned until he spotted the glow of satisfaction that lit up her eyes. Their report over the radio had informed those in the jumper of their success, but John still felt a little easier seeing it confirmed in person.

"Have a nice time?"

Elizabeth just smiled contentedly. "Well, you know me; this kind of thing is my bread and butter."

John grinned at her and turned to begin powering up the jumper.

"But hey... next time, would you do me a favor?"

He swiveled back around and narrowed his eyes at her suspiciously, a smile still ghosting around his mouth. "Sure... what?"

"Watch where you park."

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A.N.2: Thanks for reading and please please review! I appreciate it so much!


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